Soulful Bond
Anandita was a fun loving, intelligent, smart, and a sensible girl with an angelic face. Apparently, she gave the impression of an extrovert. She had a number of friends in her locality. She enjoyed watching her friends play all kinds of outdoor games and she was their cheerleader.
Years passed by and all her friends moved out of the neighbourhood to pursue their dreams and passions. Anandita started feeling a bit lonely, as she could not go much farther from her home. It was not because she did not want to go or she had no ambition of her own, but her physical condition did not permit her to venture out all by herself in this big vile world. Her movement was restricted because of her paralyzed state below her torso. However, she had an undaunted spirit and she did not want to feel sad or indulge in self - pity. She wanted to find a way to become self-reliant and make her parents proud. She was a knowledge-seeker and wanted to know everything under the sun. She had a voracious appetite for reading.
Her joy knew no bounds when her parents gifted her laptop on her 18th birthday. She felt as if the whole world was hers. Her laptop became her constant companion. She enrolled herself in NIOS (National Institute of Open Schooling) to complete her graduation. She started making friends and got in touch with her old friends through FaceBook. Her laptop became her window to the world and she created her own virtual world through it. Her parents were happy that she remained cheerful and content. They were happy that Anandita had a companion when they were away for work as both of them were holding very responsible and demanding positions and could not devote much time to their daughter. Nevertheless, they had tried to provide almost everything to her along with a caretaker for the house who looked after Anandita to the best of her capabilities.
Anandita posted her thoughts on FB on various burning and sensitive issues. Once she was giving her views on the misuse of women liberation when she started responding to appreciative comments posted by Shantanu Manas. Shantanu was impressed by her unbiased views and told her how one of his close friends was wrongly implicated. He suffered a lot owing to the strict laws made for the convenience and protection of women, which, at times, were misused.
Anandita and Shantanu started chatting regularly and their discussions were on books, poetry, education, social issues and last but not the least, politics. They seemed to have found reflectors in each other. Anandita started feeling restless until she shared her day's activities with Shantanu every evening and of course, so was the condition of Shantanu. Their discussions with each other were like tonics to their disposition. It was very surprising that they never had any personal discussions like their families though they discussed their friends, their own issues with the society, their dreams and ambitions and a whole lot of general issues. So much so, that Anandita started consulting Shantanu for her academic problems as well and Shantanu was always too happy and enthusiastic to help her in every possible way. Sometimes, when he was not very sure of himself, he would go through the relevant content himself to make her understand better. Within no time, they had become the best of friends. Anandita realized what was amiss in her life before Shantanu came by. However, she knew that she was not romantically inclined towards Shantanu. She only saw him as her very special friend, a soul mate who had completed the jigsaw puzzle of her life. There was a beautiful bonding between Anandita and Shantanu.
There was something that was disturbing Anandita for a few days, but she was not able to bring her to talk to Shantanu about it. Yes, they shared a beautiful relationship but why did they refrain from talking about their personal life. They knew nothing about each other's families. There were no pictures on the Facebook as both of them posted them very rarely, though they regularly responded on various groups and posted their views. This thought had made her rather restless and a doubt lurked into her mind. She did not want to spoil their beautiful relationship and at the same time, she did not think it to be something very difficult to talk about. She thought of bringing it up that evening.
She was waiting impatiently for Shantanu to come online but the whole evening went by without him being there. Anandita started feeling very uncomfortable, as this had never happened that they did not chat each day even if, for a short while. As the human nature goes, many untoward thoughts started crossing her mind and she was feeling very foolish that they had ever exchanged their contact numbers. It had never crossed her mind earlier as it was an unsaid pact between them to contact each other only through messenger. However, she decided that she would also bring it up whenever they chatted next. She pacified herself that he was, probably, too caught up somewhere.
Anandita's examinations were approaching and she had to prepare exceptionally well as she had aimed to top her course. Her professors also encouraged her during the contact classes and were confident that she would come first in the course. They appreciated her for her assignments and told her that her content was excellent. She felt very happy and motivated. Shantanu had been a great help to do her assignments to near perfection. She was feeling sad that he had not contacted her though she messaged her contact number to him. She was also getting worried for him, but then she had no other means to contact him or to know anything about him. She busied herself in her studies but checked for any message from him from time to time. He seemed to have vanished from the face of the earth. However, she kept herself strong and did not let her spirits down. Their discussions and Shantanu's positive attitude had rubbed well with her own ‘never – say – die' spirit. She was happy that she had Shantanu in her life at the time when she was most depressed and lonely. He had brought a lot of optimism and happiness to her life and had motivated her to stay positive irrespective of the circumstances.
Anandita worked very hard and did not let her mind sway to any kind of disturbing thoughts. Meditations helped her in keeping her calm and focused on her goal. She wanted to achieve heights and nothing would deter her from doing that. She gave her examinations with good preparation and was satisfied with her performance but her thoughts kept going back to Shantanu and deep down she had started feeling very lonely without him, but then she knew there was nothing she could do about it. Time would be her best healer.
One day while she was sitting by her window sipping coffee and reading her all-time favourite book ‘Pride and Prejudice' by Jane Austen, a thought suddenly crossed her mind and she quickly started going through the last conversation that she and Shantanu had about two months back. He had often asked her to stay strong in life and not let her happiness depend upon anybody. He had conveyed this message in different ways time and again. At those times, she thought that he was so mature and spiritual in his approach towards life but now all those messages were conveying something different. He seemed to be preparing her for the time when he would not be a part of her life. He already had some plans, which he did not want to share with her. She started wondering if there was something so drastic that he could not share with her. She seemed to have gone numb. She was wondering why she was not angry or upset with Shantanu, but she was somehow, not.
It was not that she had no other friends. Her friendly and caring nature had endeared her to many. She had some very good friends who saw her beyond her disability. However, she always felt a lack as if her soul was lonely. Whenever she felt confused or was in any kind of dilemma, she would refer to her conversations with Shantanu and it always pepped her up and filled her with confidence all over again.
She started keeping herself busy throughout the day. More so because she had become independent in her movement now and could move around the locality on her own. Her parents had got her an automatic wheelchair and she was no more dependent on her caretaker to take her around. She even went to the nearby shopping complex to buy anything that she wanted. Her favourite place was the National Library, which was not very far from her house. Her lone ventures had filled her with an extraordinary confidence and it was a delightful sight to watch her moving around so comfortably, happily and independently.
It was a proud moment for herself and her parents when she topped in her graduation and got a scholarship to pursue her Masters from Delhi College of Economics. She was overjoyed, wrote a message to Shantanu on her achievement, and thanked him for his positive contribution in her life, though she knew it would be futile, she had to share this with him. Lo and behold! Shantanu messaged back congratulating her and told her that he was really proud of her!! She was dumbstruck! She read the message again and again!! She told him to call her and messaged her contact number again but he messaged back saying that he could not call her. When she asked if she could call, he sent her his number but told her not to call and only message.
Anandita was flabbergasted and asked him the reason for being so adamant about not calling or letting her call. She messaged him an array of questions regarding his silence since last four months. She was aghast to hear his justification. He told her that he had learned a lot from her and she had become very important in his life. He realized that he too held a special place in her life. Unknowingly, they had started depending on each other to a great extent that would have done no good to them. He was getting drawn towards her, which was not right for either of them, as he was not suitable for her. She told him that he indeed held a very special place in her life but she considered him only /her great friend and a soul mate as no one had been closer to her. Moreover, she could not burden anyone with her responsibility and told him about her physical disability. Shantanu was taken aback by her revelation and could not bring himself to write anything. Anandita too kept quiet and felt that she should not have divulged about her disability in such a rash manner. Anyone would be shocked and would take time to accept. She went offline immediately and started contemplating over Shantanu's unpredictable behaviour. She was still wondering about his justification regarding his silence. She felt that there was something certainly amiss. Something was not fitting well and she wanted to find out. She wondered why Shantanu said that he was not fit for her and why he would not call or let her call. Her head had started spinning by now but she was too disturbed to go to bed. Hence, she switched on her laptop to check the Website of Delhi College of Economics. She wanted to divert her mind and there was nothing else better than taking a step towards her dream to become a lecturer of Economics.
She was going through the site and was highly impressed by the list of their alumni. Suddenly, a message from Shantanu flashed on her phone asking if she could chat through phone or messenger. She thought for a while and then agreed. Shantanu wrote that he was too shocked to react to her revelation. She should not think otherwise as he truly admired her indomitable spirit and had very high regards for her. Anandita listened to him and then confessed that she had not intended to tell him about her in such a blatant manner, but his way of talking about their relationship prompted her to do so. She said that she could understand his reaction, as anybody would be shocked to know about such a thing so unexpectedly. However, it was fine and she was quite composed now. She also said that he need not continue being her friend just out of pity for her. Shantanu said that on the contrary, her respect in his eyes had increased many folds and he was feeling very small himself for the kind of attitude he had for his disability. Anandita thought she did not get him right. She wondered if he really wrote ‘disability'! Nevertheless, she asked him to elaborate as to what he was trying to say. It was then, Shantanu unfolded the mystery why he could not take or make a call. He was deaf and mute! He also told her that he got the encouragement and strength to talk about himself from her and the way she conducted herself.
It was now Anandita's turn to be taken aback. She had never imagined that, but then soon recovered. She wrote to Shantanu that she was very proud of him and felt blessed to have such a remarkable person as her best friend. He had so many other qualities and intelligence par excellence that his disability was just a fraction of his vast personality. Moreover, the bond they shared was beyond their disabilities.
They realized that their mental compatibility is by far much more important than their physical conditions. They filled each other's hearts with a joy unparalleled and were each other's strength. They decided to meet the next day in the Café Coffee Day near Anandita's house to start a new journey together, hand – in – hand.
By
Uma Korla
